earps | inbox for ad astra;

[ she almost doesn’t recognize the name popping up on her display, wracking her memory at first — and then she remembers, finally pairs it to a busted-up face.

why he thinks she’d have any firm answer on the subject is beyond her. does that stop her from replying? of course not. ]

fuck if I know

but I guess we need repairs before we’re airborne again

know anything about fixing spaceships?

fuck would i know about spaceships

[ so basically, all this conversation is concluding is that neither of them really know shit. ]

any idea how long that usually takes?

what do I look like, ask jeeves?

[ really they’re just 0 for 0 here, good job you two. ]

much as I hate to admit it
we might have to do the camping thing for a while

don't know what that is

[ who the hell is jeeves? ~~what the hell are internet references?~~ ]

great

guess i'll find a tree or some shit to hang out with
send me a message when they're ready to beam us up

[ wait, is that it, frank? ]

never mind

so wait
that’s it?
you’re just going to go all man vs wild communing with nature out there?
don’t you think you might need, oh I don’t know
like a shelter of some kind?

[ does the danae even have tents? this is a question she should probably find out the answer to. ]

i can figure it out

[ it usually does. ]

should probably be worrying about yourself more than me
best you stick with the rest of them
they'll probably do some kumbaya fire pit shit
be a blast

[ ah, textual sarcasm. ]

shoulda coulda woulda

don’t know what about me gave you the idea that I’m a team player
also I might’ve had ulterior motives for asking
because I’m shit at building

what

you want me to build you a house out of twigs or something

what

so the big bad wolf can come along and blow it down in one puff?
i was thinking something a little sturdier than that

definitely not building you a brick house, goldilocks

[ so what if she's not blonde? so what if he has the wrong fairy tale? ]

wow
I’m almost impressed by how spectacularly you biffed that reference

look we’ve been living next door to each other anyway
it’s not that different

having jail cells next to each other has nothing to do with building you a hut

they’re only cells if you can’t get out of them yourself

I’ll find you some sticks
how hard could it be?

if you don't think it's hard, sounds like you can handle it just fine without me

okay but I'm talking like
construction and sturdiness

what if my twig house falls on me in the middle of the night and crushes me to death
that's on you